Pagkayaon As An Experience From my Family

How did I experience “pagkayaon” from my family?

Tria said that “pagkayaon” is the authentic offering of one’s self to others. It neither coerces nor manipulates. Hence, it is merely letting others know that the self is there for them. As said, it is an offering.

I thought that I will find it very hard to think of some “pagkayaon” experience as I first looked at the guide question. This is not without reasons of course. Have you ever found out a dark secret from your parent’s past? Well I did. I felt then that they didn’t really let me know who they are. The other reason maybe is that I did not understand the concept of ”pagkayaon” very well. After reading the relevant chapter several times, I have reflected that I have actually been experiencing from my family, my parents in particular, the very notion of “pagkayaon.” After which did I realize that knowing some not so good stuff from others’ past doesn’t necessarily mean that they have not genuinely offered you their selves. I have realized that people naturally is imperfect and does mistakes. This also applies to me. So, I am very grateful for my family for accepting and dealing with my imperfections. Thus, one of long list “pagkayaon” experiences from them. Consequently, I must also do the same. As Tria have conveyed, pagkayaon requires pagkayaon as a response. Not doing so is a betrayal.

Talking about a long list, I could also pick one I deem relevant and “share-able” if you know what I mean. Back in high school, not to brag, I was a student so enthusiastic about studies, conscious about grades, hungered for awards and kind of maintaining a reputation of being on the cream of the crop. Of course it was not easy. At times when I am very much anxious of not attaining my goals, I’d go share with my parents, my mother most of the times, and share my predicaments. The way they respond always lets me know and become certain that they will be there and accept me no matter what, low grades and all. And they do. They would even accept me if I become so dumb, which I won’t let happen.

Thus, they really are offering themselves to me as they are and not dictating that I do things like exert effort more to study, don’t watch the television, confiscate my cellphone or prohibit me from logging in on Facebook. Hence, a true and simple manifestation of “pagkayaon” from my family.